Rodney with low self-esteem?

[schizojuc.livejournal.com]

I just rewatched 'Tao of Rodney' and well this line of Elizabeth's (WEIR: One of the biggest things that holds people back is that somewhere deep down they believe they’re not deserving.) made me want to read stories which show Rodney as having self-esteem issues despite his boasting about his brains.

Gen or slash of any pairing is fine. Just no het please.

Comments

[schizojuc.livejournal.com]

Thank you! =)

[kirinin.livejournal.com]

Actually, it's universally agreed upon: either Rodney really *does* believe he is made of awesome(!) or his bombasity is meant to cover a wealth of inadequacy. (Yes - I eat oxymorons for bfast.)

So...

A lot of quantum mirror stories feature a Rodney potentially just as capable as canon!Rodney, but who has not proven it to himself or others. In Mirror, Mirror on the Wall (http://www.davidhewlett.co.uk/fiction/viewstory.php?sid=35), a John from what is ostensibly more canon a universe falls into one where he is about to marry Sam Carter; and Rodney isn't even in the picture. Of course, John works to get Rodney immediately INTO the picture... this one's a lot of fun, regardless of the two-dimensional Sam.

Cross-Product (http://quasar273.livejournal.com/1871.html) is another story where John travels to an AU in which Rodney is considered less valuable by all and sundry. He is considered a secondary scientist at the SGC, and has the secondary ego to match.

Trinityofone wrote an interesting permutation of this trope, called Irony (http://trinityofone.livejournal.com/108772.html); perhaps not precisely what you meant, even though it fits your stated parameters. Rodney changes because he does not trust who he is.


Then there's the ubiquitous post-Trinity fic, where Rodney's team no longer trusts him and so Rodney's ego (such as it is) takes a hit. Light of a Fading Sun (http://friendshipper.laylalawlor.com/fadingsun.shtml) is a perfect example of horrible post-Trinity/Arcturus trauma. Mithreon also wrote a post-Trinity series called Sandstorms (http://mithreon.livejournal.com/9418.html), which should not be undertaken by the faint of heart: Rodney and the Team drift apart before catastrophe brings them together again. The one with Rodney-the-apprentice-healer, the desert, and the *bugs*.


There are two fics I know of where Rodney's insecurities cause him to use an Ancient device to augment his intellect, with the expected nasty results: Theory of Everything (http://rheanna27.livejournal.com/68371.html) and the Future of Happiness and Rodney McKay (http://mklutz.livejournal.com/tag/future+of+happiness). In a similar vein, there's No More Dreadful Punishment (http://www.stickymanpress.mediawood.net/nomoredreadful.html), where Rodney believes himself to be incapable of what Atlantis asks.

Some of these are pretty dark; most are slash. Have fun!

-K

[schizojuc.livejournal.com]

Can't wait to read them all. Thanks!

[sarcastic-fi.livejournal.com]

please please please say you have an alt link to mirror mirror on the wall' because it sounds exactly like something i would LOVE but this link doesn't work!

[kirinin.livejournal.com]

Must've changed their links; here (http://davidhewlett.tarlanx.com/fiction/viewstory.php?sid=35) ya go. ;)

-K

[sarcastic-fi.livejournal.com]

thanks so much that rocks!

[schizojuc.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I will check it out.