John Mentally Affected By The Eye/The Storm

[deceptivechasm.livejournal.com]

I was wondering if there are any fics out there where they concentrate on how John deals with his actions during the storm. Yes, he did it to save Atlantis and his people, but he did kill 60 Genii just the same.  Are there any stories where he is hesitant to pick up a gun again, or where perhaps he feels remorse for the Genii soldiers he killed, or even becomes more closed off and not guarded because he didn't realize what he would do to protect those on the expedition.

Gen and McShep welcome. I'd also wouldn't mind reading from an outsider's point of view as well.